I want to address the Paleo Challenge that I mentioned last month. If you haven't noticed, it hasn't happened. I announced it loud and proud that the kickoff would be September 1st, and it wasn't. I am the worst.
I promise you everything I am worth ( 2 cats and by now maybe the steering wheel of my Jeep) that I did not forget about this. There is a good reason why this challenge is on hold. I am waiting to get the guidelines from my gym, because I want the Health Gone Wild challenge to be exactly the same as the CrossFit508 challenge. This is so I don't get confused, and also so I know that the challenge has the appropriate level of do-ability. I don't want it to be so easy that we all gain weight and commit suicide. On the flipside, I don't want to be responsible for you fainting at the gym DJ Tanner style because you starved yourself to avoid being fatter than Gibbler at the boy/girl pool party. This Paleo Challenge is about FEELING better. I have no time for eating disorders and I honestly don't give an F how you look in a bathing suit (I still accept pictures though.) So, the new challenge kick-off date is September 18th. Stay tuned, cuties.
I know you are all dying to know, so I won't drag it out any longer. The September 11th Honor Workout that I mentioned in my last post was awesome. Thanks for asking. It was so hard, but I did it. I suck royally at deadlifts, and the first part of the workout was 100 deadlifts at 115lbs. This is how my life tends to work. Anyways, I suck so bad at deadlifting that prior to this 9/11 workout, the coaches at my gym filmed me doing them to show me how terrifying the situation really was. I looked like Grandmother Willow. I always use that term to talk about people who are really tall and weird looking and give off the illusion that they cannot control their humungous limbs. That was me in the video. Grandmother Willow. It was embarrassing.
Thankfully, by the time I got to CrossFit Providence on Saturday morning, I had done enough deadlift practicing in my head (way too lazy to practice them for real) that I marched right in there and did the best deadlift anyone has ever seen including God. I let Nick get first place in our round, which was smart of me because he was so happy with himself that he ran right home and cooked that chicken for me. He really doesn't know how lucky he is to have me.
OK Now that we are all caught up on my rock star life, I realize that I have not posted a workout for people to try in a long time. Today I am going to post a workout that I recently did in my front yard. This is a fun one because you do it with a partner. If you don't have any friends, please don't call me because this workout was hard and I already did it once. But you have done it ZERO times, so get on the Craigslist “Platonic Friends” section and find a suitable partner. Then later go back to the “Casual Encounters” and find ME a suitable partner....K here we go...
3 Rounds.
Partner A walks 100 meters holding 2 30lb dumbbells. One in each hand down by your sides. If you don't have dumbbells find something heavy. You can also just hold one giant heavy thing, over your head. I don't care what it is.
Partner B- Does burpees while this is happening. A burpee is when you jump down on your bully, then jump back up and clap over your head.
THEN SWITCH. So now partner B goes for the walk while partner A burpees.
When Partner B gets back from the “heavy object walk” Partner A stops doing burpees and goes for a 250 meter run.
Partner B will begin doing box jumps. If you don't have a 20inch wooden box, you cant jump onto anything. Stairs, a stump, or just jump up as high as you can.
When Partner A returns, SWITCH.
This is one round.
Keep track of box jumps and burpees and that will be your “score.” Try to beat your partner. If they beat you, get a new partner next time.
If you can't measure out 100 and 250 meters. The walk should take a minute and the run about a minute and a half.***
So basically
Partner A – walk with weight Partner B- Burpee
Partner B- walk with weight Partner A- Burpee
Partner A- go for run Partner B – jump
Partner B- go for run Partner A- jump
Do it three times.
I love you. Bye.
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