Cookies!!!!!!

At first I was kicking myself in the ass for not taking a picture of these cookies, but then I remembered that they literally look like absolute yeti shit. No joke. But they taste amazing and they are 98% Paleo, so I am going to post the recipe.

I am not lying when I say that everyone who has tried these little shit nuggets loves them. I am also not lying when I say that I ate 40 of them over a 2 day span one time. For those of you who are keeping track, thats an average of 20 cookies a day which beats my last record of 18 sugar cookies in one sitting. Does anyone else think I was supposed to be born a boy? Seriously...deep voice, no desire whatsoever to say things like "lmao" or "hun," and the appetite of the entire Hogan family? Well, add THAT to the list of things for me to stress out about. Right between "the apocolypse in December 2012" and "what color to get for my manicure"....yep, we will squeeze in "being a boy" right there.

GROSS LOOKING COOKIES

Ingredients

- 2 cups flax seed
- 2 cups diced walnuts (in the baking aisle)
- one bag organic dried apple rings
- 1 cup of honey
- cinnamon
- 2 eggs
- vanilla

Directions

1. Get a giant bowl and dump in the flax seed and the walnuts.

2. Microwave the cup of honey for thirty seconds. Add that to the bowl.

3. Add the two eggs to the bowl.

4. Add a little vanilla. About one tablespoon.

5. Chop up the apple rings into little bits, and add them to the bowl. As many as you want.

6. Stir the shit out of it and add so much cinnamon. Seriously, so much. I always overdo everything, and even I think I add a lot of cinnamon. Like a good 20 shakes or more.

7. Scoop little spoonfuls onto a buttered cookie sheet. You will need two cookie sheets, this recipe makes a lot of these little f*ckers. Also, they won't expand, so jam pack that tray.

8. Put in the oven on 350 for about 11 minutes.

9. MOST IMPORTANT STEP. The cookies will look absolutely terrible, and they will be so soft. Let them cool on the counter for 25 minutes and then I would recommend moving them to the fridge. They WILL harden.

10. Eat 20 today, and 20 tomorrow.

These cookies are better than regular cookies because they are gluten free and all natural. They also have a VERY low amount of honey per cookie as the one cup is spread out over the whole batch. As they get colder, they will stop looking like crap. But once you taste them you won't care how they look because these things are mad good.